Voices raging in my head, screaming evil demands
tormenting this mere man
twisting my words, trying to bend my promises, throwing my morals and ethics back in my face
24/7
Everywhere I look, everything I see and hear seems to be vices
the monkey on my back has started up again, fuck he's been quiet for 12 years...
I feel like no one understands that I'm standing on the base plate
(this feels dark and haunting like it was back at day one)
I try to remind myself of all the misery and destruction
the shadow that tears you apart from the inside, the truth that is addiction
- there's no such thing as "only once or just one"
"Go on have a 'free' taste, see how good I make you feel, see how I melt all your troubles away"
"watch how self confident I make you feel, watch how popular I make you with the 'in' crowd"
'I' will give you all you've ever dreamed of, 'I' will make you soar above everything human
'I' will make you feel invincible, 'I' will make you God and feel untouchable...
LIES, ALL LIES, the truth is more like -
'I' will surge through you and turn on senses you never felt, but only once - just to get you hooked on me, you will crave and desire 'my' chemical kiss...but never achieve it again like the first time
'I' will draw you into a world of association, as long as you have 'me' those around you will worship the ground you crawl on (but it's 'me' they want...which you won't see)
'I' will supply you all the warmth you need...you'll sell your soul to have 'me' inside you
time and time again
'I' will make you feel like God or whatever your fantasy is
'I' will have you believe everyone hates our new 'friendship'
'I' will have you push everyone away from you who cares...'I'm' all you NEED
THEN ONLY THEN
will 'I' reveal 'my' true desire
no longer is your soul just enough, no longer is tearing apart your self esteem and loved ones,
no longer is controlling your every thought, want and whim
no longer is your life enough...
'I' want you dead
that is 'my' payment for everything 'I've' destroyed about you and your troubles
that is 'my' reward for making your life (Oh what did you say in our first dance?) care free!
freeflowpoet
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