Sunday, May 28, 2017


I'll unzip my skin and show you the bones that make up my skeletons within,
I don't forget the sins I've committed, I know I once justified every single one of them
I don't forget the things done to me, nor do I waste time forgiving those who don't see the wrong in how they abuse kids or traded my innocence trying to protect others...
I don't hate anyone of them, it's their behaviours and attitudes I dislike
I pray they all have their eyes opened and they find some happiness and peace, mercy and compassion,
despite my humanness screaming castrate em all and let em drown in their own misery, none of em deserve mercy or second chances...but that's a reaction of a scarred mind, not of a changed heart..
I was given a second change, over and over again
and when I did change, the ones who wanted me to change fell off or tried to drag me back to that darkness of hell,
So I walked away for the sake of my own survival and so I didn't corrupt my heart again, trying to rescue and save others...that ain't my place, I get that now, I understand it now...I'm the only one I can save and change
those attitudes and behaviours aren't acceptable when I accepted them aimed at me, nor are they acceptable for me to just brush aside, when dumped upon others...
that's just not acceptable, full stop (thank you for showing me another way, how to love another, how to love myself...that it's ok to walk away)


Saturday, May 27, 2017

If God's not Real...

I still remember how the rope felt against my neck
I still recall the tears of anger & betrayal trailing down my face
how they felt drying upon my skin
Tupac playing in the background,
Noone but God knowing where I was, what I was about to do
Noone to hear this child's cries, all alone in a crowd of people, all doing their own thing
Tethering on the edge of milk creates stacked up,
One step forward...
down I tumbled...
If God's not real, explain to me how the rope snapped as Tupac's words "they win when your soul dies" played,
explain to me, how I'm still alive, how I survived all the trauma I waded through,
how hell never claimed me, but I slaughtered my demons & rose up from the battlefields...alive, ready to thrive 


Tuesday, May 9, 2017

Test me

A mountain in my path
You think that's gonna stop me?
Why does it feel like the world is against me, I only want to achieve my heart's desire 
Why does it feel like I keep getting fucked over?
Go on, keep pushing my limits
I'll only find new heights to scale
Go on, keep testing my resolve, my patience, just keep blocking my path...
I promise I'll make you regret thinking this one 'man' is a push over,
I promise I will make you regret bringing the fight out in me
No, I will not back down
No, I will not let you take away my rights,
while trying to charge me full price (while expecting me to do all the work, including yours)
Go on, keep pushing me
I promise I will KO you & everything you bring to hold me down, I'll destroy it all
and be the last 'man' standing, in this war you wage against me
I'll keep rising above all my adversities...
cause it's not my will driving me on
So I know how this will end
(this is my victory, this is for all the voiceless innocents who have, are or will be harmed...I won't stop fighting the good fight)
Just keep trying me, bring it (bring it on)