Squish

My blood boils
I can't believe the judge denied me justice...again
As I had to put all the years of this rock spider's abuse on paper
then spend a day answering questions, through tears
I couldn't switch off the flashes of his actions and it was so hard not to gag
even my lawyer was sure I'd be compensated for the years of hell I endured
but no
Did I hear him right? Did the judge say he's not awarding me justice cause I won't press charges?
I don't know where the guy is, even if I wanted to have my day in court
He's probably in some single mother's daughter's bed or trying to bed em...
he never cared for discreetness but would brag and boast
And as I read reports of kiddie fiddlers breaching orders or getting off with
nothing more than a slap on the wrist, while scores of victims are locked up in a prison of memories and stench that stains the soul
my blood boils and I can't help but contradict my own morals...never lay judgement
here I can't help myself and just wanna torture these lower slugs in the garden of human beings
I entertain the images of what my self righteous justice would look and feel like...
one bullet to the head would be to easy, so give me the whole barrel to fire...
one shot to the left knee while I stare so intensely into the eyes
(oh GOD the power feels so good, I'm no better in this scenario cause I'm the one now holding the power over another)
one shot to the right knee, come on little spider crawl away...try to run
one shot to the tools of your crime, fuck that hurts hey? Oops did I just stomp down upon your hands as you beg forgiveness and cry pleadingly to me, music to my ears, what was that you said? You didn't hurt anyone...do you really believe your own bullshit?
If you lower forms of scum really never hurt anyone why the need for protection and identity suppression orders when your crimes come to light?
one shot to the left hand, wound you like Christ going on the cross
one shot to the right hand...revenge sounds so damn good, sounds so better than any sentence a judge could pass down
One last shot, right between the eyes as I stare right into them
then just to release pent up rage and disgust, I slam my foot right through your skull
crush it against the concrete then lay a few damn solid kicks into your shell
A life for a life...that is what every victim of abuse loses when that innocence is stolen away...
You're not worth wasting another day, I don't play with demons anymore
I win everyday I live my life doing my best
It sounds good what I just shared but it's just thoughts written down
I'm not your judge and jury, I don't live by a criminal code of unwritten ethics
You're nothing but a rock spider, but hear my courageous roar
"I will survive, I will rise up and reclaim my power, I will live with Godly principles to the best of my abilities and ask forgiveness when I do pass judgement in disgust and entertain 'street justice'"
I don't have faith in our justice system, I don't trust that judges have the interests of victims at heart...but I pray that may change one day, I pray for protection for all our children and I pray for...
Sorry Lord I can't lie, I can't keep a straight face and say I pray for salvation for these creatures...
I just wanna squish them all!


freeflowpoet