Fear, wrath & total powerlessness

 I’m sitting in a chair watching myself standing before me

What kind of devil’s work is this?

I don’t quite know which one is the real me, weird huh?

I test reality by standing up

only to have my legs give under me,

my heart is pounding, not only in my chest

but my ears to, everything sounds muffled, far away...

I’m confused, I’m feeling trapped

powerless against, what? Memories?

I’m safe surely, or no I’m actually not (I’m just as confused as you, you who tries to reach me)

Why can’t I fucking stand up? Why is my mouth so dry, that nothing quenches it?

Where am I? Am I here, this isn’t my body, WHERE AM I, WHAT IS THIS, WHO ARE YOU, GET AWAY FROM ME

The room has disappeared, I’m not even sure I’m standing in front of...where am I?

Confusion, I’m in extreme flight mode and I don’t know why

I’m AFRAID

but a minute ago, there wasn’t anything to fear...

Voices all around me, I can’t fucking breathe

this is all consuming, I’m feeling trapped 

Pitch black... all is slowing down,

Um, who put that hole in the wall,

No, say it wasn’t me, Oh fuck

wrath hijacked me...

I didn’t even know

I didn’t even know...

freeflowpoet