It’s not black and white

You are my Yin to my Yang,

my anger to my love,

my lava to my rain

my crumbling clay to my crisp fresh air

You’re the keeper of my demons, you’re my trumpet call of my archangels 

You’re my black wolf, you’re my white wolf

and my conscience is my area of gray

I hold an overflowing glass of anger

while a shattered glass of rage wets the table that sits to the side of me

and I grip tight a glass of calmness…

looking forward to drinking from the cup of peace

So many mistakes, so much pain…you are my past

So many smiles, so much love…you are now my past as well, but still my future too 

You’re my demise, the voice that condemns and lies

You’re my encouragement, the voice that builds me up and challenges all my doubts

I am complex, as humans are

one is a relationship laced with regret and harshness but growth, the other a relationship of amends and loving guidance…both lead me down different paths, that crisscross 

until I find the point I must step off

I don’t have to choose a side

for both teach different lessons, ahh the penny drops 

One is the hell I sometimes revisit through flashbacks and triggered memories 

The other like heaven filled with wisdom and forgiveness 

both reinforce my choices for today,

both bring tears to my eyes,

both influence who I am and why

both litter my heart with pain, two different similars

two different goodbyes, 

two different types of tears…

but it’s all enmeshed grief, two different goodbyes 

freeflowpoet