I Cannot Change my Past (Know Thyself)

I wouldn’t waste my time to go back and tell a younger me “don’t do this or don’t do that”

I know I wouldn’t listen, I was stubborn like that!

I know it wouldn’t change anything I survived

cause I didn’t trust myself, so why would I trust someone saying they were a future me...I’d probably write the meeting off as a bad trip or someone I’d have to guard myself against.

It’s a sad reflection, knowing I’d flip myself off and disregard all I know now, cause I didn’t feel worthy or really cared, back then

life was a slow suicide loop, stuck!

And yet death felt too good for the filth I thought I was...

How can a child think so lowly of themselves?

I’m glad I came out the other side, alive and renewed with a thirst to thrive

I (really) don’t care what others have to say about me

nor do I care what people think

when I write about learning all over, how to love my inner girl...so I can learn to love who I want to be as this adult, who’s just trying to figure out who she is...get to know thyself

and maybe then I’ll let you

in

freeflowpoet