I Guess It Is...Goodbye

I guess it's a chapter closed

so many similarities, my gut's telling me

its gotta be you

and the conflicting feelings start

Man, you taught me what love felt like

swept me off my feet

the moment my eyes saw you

sitting across the foyer from me

You showed me what a gentleman truly was

never made me feel uncomfortable 

or untrusting of you,

never had me checking or questioning 

your motives

I can't believe the amount of times

you had me sitting on the kitchen floor

daylight turning into night,

night into morning light

and still we found more things to say

I'd play with the telephone cord

listening to your voice

listening to your silence, imagining you

smiling 

not wanting to say goodbye, not wanting to be 

the one to hang up...

I fondly recall our intimate moments 

still can't forget those eyes

(those green grey eyes *sigh*)

It was I not you, who feared you meeting

my family

I softly protested saying I didn't want you feeling rushed

while in my head I was overwhelmed 

but man, so far head over heels

in love (yep, love!)

I remember the tears and heartache when we ended us

I remember your body wrapped around the hollow shell

I became...

my past destroyed beauty once again

I lost you right there,

you lost me and couldn't reach me again

...I heard you, felt you slow, felt you trying to

comfort me

(but I was gone, disassociated)

I've never thought rejection could hurt so much

never thought it'd be me, causing such pain

to myself, to, to you

how can love be so powerless 

that it wasn't enough to save us?

While I was sad we ended the way we did

I have never been so grateful,

never regretted what we shared

You taught me real love, that I was worth

knowing it

*sigh*

We faded as the years passed

then you were just a memory...

tried a few times to chase you up

but your number soon went from

a strangers voice on the other end

to forgotten (you moved on, moved on)

Then out of the blue I try once more to find you

and I'm still trying to deny the similarities 

but I came across an archived death notice 

...from what I could read

it said you died 2012, 35 years old

REALLY! No, no don't want it to be

but the haunting similarities...

what a way to have said goodbye, I'm sorry

yet no I'm not

11/11/15 freeflowpoet