Lies In My Head/Lies In The Mirror

Lies, that is all my head tells me

I know that for I preach it everyday

But I'm just like you...different and unique

I feel like I'm judged every second, everyday

It's not you, yeah - it's me

I hear myself say all the positives in the world

yet inside I'm suffocating from ego

yeah that bastard self will, there ain't no spirituality within right now

It's the monkey on my back, screaming and laughing

"what you really think this bullshit will stop me...you think you'll win"

Fuck, lord help me

I'm helpless alone, my strength is gone right now...

I'm about ready to drown

I don't know who to believe, if I wanna believe...anything

I hear my own voice saying "one day at a time" and "you know you need to get out ya head - cause that's where the true BULLSHIT is"

While inside my head all I hear is

"go on go isolate, be alone"

"you know they think you're dumb and lazy"

"you know they think every time you say sorry or thank you, it's fake...you're fake"

"you're a freeloading excuse, a pain who's always in the way...it's really all about you"

"a little shot of H will take the edge off, especially washed down with alcohol ...and a dose or two of those PAIN pills, you wanna try this ice...the old speed freak in you craves, go on what harm will one more run do"?

God ( as I understand you) I pray please take this obsession away

I know my head lies and twists emotions when I'm lost within this beast

I know what is truth

and being alone won't serve to help anyone...

No matter what my head screams

I know the truth.

freeflowpoet