What has changed in those around me, so much has changed in me
looking in the mirror, I'm trying to figure who's looking back out at me
Waded through so much anger, broken all the chains that bounded me
but when I call out to those who called themselves my friends
not many answer back
Everyone keeps telling me how I'm not alone
but God doesn't keep me warm laying in my bed at night
but a hug from family, as warm and comforting as it is, just doesn't cut it
the love and smiles from those who know me now, refreshing as it is
doesn't corrode the stone around the inside layer of my heart.
I'm not ashamed of my past
I don't regret the pain I've caused, cause I own it
cause I accept the role I played in it all and I'm able to let it go
and I do what I have to, to learn something from those mistakes
I forgive myself and those who've stuck around or opened their arms again
I try not to judge anymore
I try and slow down and listen now
I try to close these eyes and see with my heart
but I'm far from perfect, I'm full of defects and humanness
Yes I still feel and sometimes my emotions cloud my reactions
I still run with my will, instead of free will
I leap before I look around, some days
(yeah I make mistakes, you seemed surprised)
You think you know me, cause you've read a few of the lines I've written
you think you know me, cause you've heard some of the stories I've told of my life
you think you know me, cause you've spent time with me...
you've not spent enough though
it's never enough
my secrets run deep, even I've not explored the darkness within
I feel it
sneaking up on me, watching from the shadows
whispering in my ears
like the dragon who once used to entice me to get higher
and blur the lines between life and death
right and wrong, pure and corrupt
Where am I going with this, who am I speaking to?
Maybe it's you
or maybe it's the man staring back at me from the mirror
as I walk away...
freeflowpoet
looking in the mirror, I'm trying to figure who's looking back out at me
Waded through so much anger, broken all the chains that bounded me
but when I call out to those who called themselves my friends
not many answer back
Everyone keeps telling me how I'm not alone
but God doesn't keep me warm laying in my bed at night
but a hug from family, as warm and comforting as it is, just doesn't cut it
the love and smiles from those who know me now, refreshing as it is
doesn't corrode the stone around the inside layer of my heart.
I'm not ashamed of my past
I don't regret the pain I've caused, cause I own it
cause I accept the role I played in it all and I'm able to let it go
and I do what I have to, to learn something from those mistakes
I forgive myself and those who've stuck around or opened their arms again
I try not to judge anymore
I try and slow down and listen now
I try to close these eyes and see with my heart
but I'm far from perfect, I'm full of defects and humanness
Yes I still feel and sometimes my emotions cloud my reactions
I still run with my will, instead of free will
I leap before I look around, some days
(yeah I make mistakes, you seemed surprised)
You think you know me, cause you've read a few of the lines I've written
you think you know me, cause you've heard some of the stories I've told of my life
you think you know me, cause you've spent time with me...
you've not spent enough though
it's never enough
my secrets run deep, even I've not explored the darkness within
I feel it
sneaking up on me, watching from the shadows
whispering in my ears
like the dragon who once used to entice me to get higher
and blur the lines between life and death
right and wrong, pure and corrupt
Where am I going with this, who am I speaking to?
Maybe it's you
or maybe it's the man staring back at me from the mirror
as I walk away...
freeflowpoet
I'm staring at the man in the mirror.
ReplyDeleteI'm asking him to change his ways.
No message could have been any clearer,
If you wanna make the world a better place
Take a look at yourself and then make the change.
Michael Jackson
Except that your resolve isn't tested when you are standing in front of the mirror; that moment of reflection (pun intended) is just passing insight. I often wonder where it's all going when I get up after a night of broken sleep (I don't remember the last time I slept properly the whole night through) and wonder "when am going to change this?"
At those moments, you are alone.
I like this one. But I am still waiting for you to write about fluffy bunnies and hot chocolate.
um...maybe the fluffy bunnies and hot chocolate will come one day! I'm picturing holding the bunnies over the hot chocolate laughing evilly ;)
ReplyDelete